Boosting Self-esteem
The Power of Laughing at Yourself and More
Self-esteem often feels like this big, elusive thing we’re chasing, especially when we’re caught up in what other people think of us. I know firsthand how exhausting it can be, feeding the comparison trap, feeling ashamed of little mistakes, and constantly worrying about how I looked to others.
But what if I told you that one of the best ways to boost your confidence is to laugh at yourself?
Learning to Laugh
The best thing I did for myself was learn how to laugh at my own mistakes. Sounds simple, right? But it was transformative.
Picture this with me, okay? So I tripped in public (we’ve all been there), and instead of looking around, face burning with embarrassment, I giggled. A genuine, lighthearted laugh. And you know what happened? Instead of awkward stares, people giggled with me. Some even came over, smiled, and said, “Oh, I’ve totally done that!”.
It felt humanizing, connecting, and oddly… empowering. I craved this experience, so I started doing this everywhere:
At the gym, when I awkwardly flubbed a movement
At work, when I misspoke or made a minor error
In my relationships, when I’d mess up and admit, “Well, that was awkward, huh?”
Laughter didn’t just take the sting out of mistakes, it created moments of vulnerability and connection. Instead of isolating myself in shame, I leaned into it! And in doing so, I gained confidence and self-acceptance.
The Confidence Connection
Why does laughing at yourself work? Great question, it’s because it shifts the narrative. Instead of seeing your mistake as proof of your inadequacy, you see it as a reminder of your humanity. It’s like telling yourself, “It’s okay, you’re doing fine!”. And that kindness you show yourself is where confidence starts to grow.
Other Ways to Boost Your Self-Esteem
While laughing at yourself is powerful, here are a few more tools to add to your confidence toolkit:
Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself like you’d treat a close friend. If your friend tripped or made a mistake, would you criticize them, or would you say, “Don’t worry, it happens to everyone”? Try offering that same kindness to yourself.
Celebrate Small Wins: Every little success counts. Did you show up to the gym even when you didn’t feel like it? Awesome. Did you make a choice that aligns with your goals, even if it felt hard? That’s a win!
Challenge the Comparison Trap: Social media is a breeding ground for comparison, and it’s easy to feel like you’re falling short. When you notice those thoughts creeping in, remind yourself that what you see is only a highlight reel. You’re on your own path, and it’s not a competition.
Practice Vulnerability: Confidence doesn’t come from perfection; it comes from showing up as you are. Let people see the real you; the you who makes mistakes, has quirks, and all the other weird stuff. Vulnerability is a bridge that connects us to others, making us feel less alone.
Focus on What You Can Control: Some things are out of your hands. Instead of worrying about what others think, shift your energy to what you can influence like your attitude, effort, and how you respond to challenges.
Your Challenge
Laugh at yourself this week. Let the next trip, mistake, or awkward moment be an opportunity to giggle, connect, and remind yourself that everyone stumbles. It’s part of being human.
And while you’re at it, celebrate the moments when you show kindness to yourself, share a vulnerable truth, or step outside your comfort zone. By leaning into your imperfections and showing up authentically, you’ll find that confidence isn’t something you have to chase—it’s something you build from within.
If you want to share your thoughts with me or get more support, send Kiley an email at info.khhllc@gmail.com
